How to Break Up With Your Friends

Lifestyle, Mindset

I’m unapologetically passionate about helping people fast-track their own success. Creating a vision for your life, setting goals, and taking action into making them a reality is one of the most rewarding and effective processes anyone can experience.

Unfortunately, you might also find that not everyone is so supportive of you pushing yourself to change. People who you thought were some of your closest friends suddenly seem resistant to you bettering yourself. And who needs another voice out there telling you that you can’t achieve what you want? What kind of friend is that? 

As hard as it seems, they’re the kind of friend you need to leave behind. 

Your success? It’s your duty. No one else’s. Abide by it.

As Grant Cardone says, your success is your duty. If you want to succeed, then you need to choose yourself. To commit to yourself. It’s a responsibility that is yours and yours alone. And if your friends can’t support you in wanting to create a better reality for yourself, then they aren’t really your friend at all. 

It really boils down to this: Are they a positive force in your life, or not?

Now, I know that it can feel very selfish when your life is focused on you, but there’s no other way that you’re going to achieve your goals. You have to focus on yourself. Achieving success isn’t just going to happen to you. A friend, a real friend, is someone who supports and challenges you on your way to realizing your success — they don’t put up roadblocks built of negativity and doubt. 

10X Ladies changed my life. It could change yours, too. 

This is precisely why I found joining the 10X Ladies group so refreshing. This is a group of driven, supportive women who are all working toward achieving their goals, and being aligned with these women has made me feel more empowered, more supported, and less alone as a woman professional than I’ve probably ever felt in my life. This is what friendship is supposed to feel like. I’m so grateful I’ve found them. 

Not only am I now in a place where I feel the support I needed to create the strength my goals require, but I’m also learning how to be a better friend. And as contradictory as it sounds, one of the things I’ve learned about being a better friend is learning how to let certain relationships go.

This can take place over time. There doesn’t need to be a big, dramatic blow up. Some people — maybe even you — might want that drama in their lives, but it’s not going to serve you positively. Just let there be space. Give the relationship space. Be gentle to those around you. Your intention is not to hurt people, so don’t let defensiveness overwhelm your emotions. Again, give it space. Give it time. Trust me. 

Accept that sometimes you’re the problem. 

Because here’s another unfortunate reality: Sometimes you’re the one who is going to be left behind. It’s going to hurt. Your initial response is that you’re going to want explanations, you’re going to bristle against it, create resistance, and wonder what it is that you did wrong. 

Upon reflection in life, you’re probably going to find that there’s always an opportunity to be a better influence. You might feel that you might owe someone an apology, and that’s an opportunity that you should take — for them, not for you — but that’s a situation that requires them wanting to hear what you have to say. 

They might not want to hear it, and as much as we talk about selling at Cardone University, this is a situation where you have to read the room, and if the room is saying you need to let it go, then as hard as it is, you’re gonna have to let that shit go. 

There’s always room to learn, even in the painful moments. Look for ways in which you can grow. 

But you should also learn from this moment. What can you take away from this situation? How can it propel you forward? Every experience is a building block for the future, so what are you building? Is it something positive and beautiful and reflective of your future self that you want to see? Or is it something toxic? Always learn how to make it the former vs. the latter. 

It’s so hard to be the bigger person sometimes, and can feel really hard to handle your shit like an adult, but once you do, you can feel the power that it creates in your life. You can feel yourself changing for the better. 

So that’s my advice. Surround yourself with those people who want you to be the best version of yourself you can be, even if it’s a different version than the one they’re accustomed to. Be that person for your friends. And when that alignment just can be met, give the relationships distance. Don’t force the situation. Don’t look for drama. Let that shit go. Better things are on the horizon. 

Need help focusing on the things that really matter so you can finally make your dreams a reality? Cardone Ventures can help! Check out our events page to register for one (or two or three!) of our life-changing events!